How do you respond to the events in your life?
One of the most important variables affecting the way our life takes shape is our ability to respond to our experience.
In any inner work it is important to start where you are, and to do so with love, without judgment or self-punishment. No matter what your current circumstance, begin with loving acceptance of that situation. This may be challenging, but it is possible! Love yourself enough to accept these circumstances without punishing judgment. (Caveat - if you know you have made an error, perhaps hurt another, allow yourself to apologize. But still - no need to punish yourself, simply correct the error.)
If you remove judgment from your analysis, your response to the situation will change. It will become less punishing toward self and others, and it will become less defensive.
Once we begin to respond to our situation and to others in our lives from a less defensive place, we change the entire spiral that will unfold. A more neutral or even a loving response from us will evoke a more neutral or even loving response from the other. And this begins to shift the entire exchange.
This shift can occur even if you are in a dialogue within yourself about your current situation. When you begin to soften your inner judgment, apply love and acceptance and reframe your response, your inner dialogue will soften. This will shift your decisions moving forward, which will change your entire experience as you move forward.
Take a breath, take a pause, send a little love to yourself and then respond. And see what happens.